Ask any introvert (ahem, yours truly) and we’ll tell you; being alone rocks! Give me my office, a Ludovico Eunaudi playlist, a good latte, my laptop, and I’m good to go! Could stay there for hours being “lonely” and come away smiling, with a sad sigh that I’m once again being forced to enter society.

I was recently reading a book that eluded to how Jesus sought out lonely places.

“Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” Luke 5:16

This is only one reference, but numerous other verses in the gospels use almost the exact words “lonely places” when referring to Jesus withdrawing alone.

The word lonely grabbed me there, and maybe it grabbed you too. Why? Because I think we as a culture associate being lonely solely as a negative thing. For myself, when I think of the word lonely, I picture a friendless person who is sad, or a bullied child who is sad, or a homeless person who is sad. Are you seeing what I’m getting at? I think we add an additional frame of sadness over the act of being alone/lonely. We picture it solely as a negative thing that must be overcome. If someone is alone for too long or out of society, people begin to worry. If we see a person sitting alone, we may feel compelled to go see if they are okay. If someone says they need time to themselves, we assume something is wrong and offer to bring over a casserole.

The word “Lonely” is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as “Sad because one has no friends or company.”

However, the word “lonely” used in the scripture reference above, and in any other reference to Jesus and “lonely places” that I could find, has a different meaning. The word used in the original text is the word “eremos”, which means solitary. Here’s some verbiage on the word provided by biblehub.com, and the Strong’s Greek Concordance.

“properly, an uncultivated, unpopulated place; a desolate (deserted) area; (figuratively) a barren, solitary place that also provides needed quiet (freedom from disturbance)”

That lends Jesus’ withdrawals a slightly different light, doesn’t it? The meaning of that word makes me question the mental image I had before; of Jesus trudging off to sit on a cliff edge somewhere and cry. (Definitely something I’ve never done, ahem). On the contrary! This word, in the context of what we know about Jesus’ ministry makes great sense.

Jesus was constantly being poured out; constantly either being disturbed, or causing a necessary disturbance. At any given time there were people around him who needed teaching, healing, rebuking, or comfort. He was constantly giving of Himself, without ever being refilled by others in ways we would consider refilling. Jesus lead a life of disturbance.

Which brings me back to eremos. Jesus “often withdrew to uncultivated, unpopulated places that provided needed quiet and freedom from disturbance.”

Again, addressing the introverts in the room; doesn’t this sound like the best day ever?? Me? In a solitary place with quiet and freedom from disturbance?? Please and thank you.

Now, I don’t think scripture mentions this just to show us that Jesus needed a break. While his withdrawals point to his humanness and need for a time of refilling, this recounting also gives us license to do the same. Jesus was fully man and fully God. He lived a perfect life, so it follows that everything He did was perfect.

Including leaving behind all the people that needed Him when He needed to be refilled. Jesus, the creator of the universe, left behind everyone who needed him when He needed to rest and pray. This included the cripples, the sick, the poor, and those in need of spiritual saving.

Even Jesus, in His humanness, had limits and acknowledged that by taking breaks.

I’m repeating myself in several different forms here because I think it is so important to get this, especially in light of how our culture tends to do things.

We pour ourselves out to others over and over, even while our spiritual tanks are well past empty. We only take time to ourselves if/when everyone else is taken care of, or when we feel like we’ve accomplished enough. But that’s not the example Jesus set here.

Jesus often withdrew.

I don’t want to assume things of scripture that it doesn’t tell us, but it is my own speculation that he did this on a somewhat planned basis. The text says often, inferring that this was at least common.

What I’m getting at here is that I think it would do us all well if we if followed Jesus’ example in this area. Our current culture either idolizes the need for loneliness, taking the form of isolation to the extreme and full fledged adults who can’t answer a phone call, or shoves it entirely to the side for the sake of productivity and hustle culture.

We’re never done with our lists, our hobbies, our families. There’s always someone we need to call, a podcast episode to listen to, or an event to get gussied up for.

Newsflash: Jesus had people that needed him constantly too. Jesus had no shortage of events he could go to. Jesus had no shortage of people who wanted to catch up with him.

Yet, He made time for what was important. Time alone, away from distractions, with the Father.

How could you follow his example? How could you slow down your life, or carve out time to be away from all the things that distract you and keep you going at a million mile per hour pace?

I have a few suggestions.

1. Try scheduling a spiritual retreat day ahead of time. Look a month or two ahead; whatever timeframe works for you. Schedule a day or even just a morning to go be “lonely” somewhere with your bible and a notebook. Leave the headphones, turn off social media on your phone, and don’t talk to a friend in the car on your way there. Allow yourself time and space to be lonely with the Lord.
2. If you can’t carve that much time out of your schedule, I have questions about your schedule, but that’s another blog post. But if that is the case, try driving to work in silence; no radio, no podcast, no phone calls. Be silent, or quote scripture, or pray.
3. Get up an hour or half an hour earlier than you usually do, don’t take your phone with you, and go sit in a corner with your bible.
4. Go on a walk after work in a (safe) secluded area where you aren’t likely to run into people. Make this a habit one or two days a week if possible. If that’s not possible, try once or twice a month.

Whatever your strategy, I believe that this practice (whatever that looks like for you) is a very beneficial one for us as human beings. We are created beings, created with limits and needs. Jesus had those same human limits as he lived on this earth, and He exampled tending to those limits.

How can you seek out lonely places?

He who is mighty has done a great thing!

-M-