When I think back on 2021, I’m filled with satisfaction. The person I am and life in general are almost unrecognizable a year later….but at the same time not much has changed. I know that makes loads of sense. 2021 stretched me in so many ways, most of which were uncomfortable and frustrating at the time, but I can now see were preparing me for harder things to come.

At the beginning of the year I hadn’t ridden in so long and was longing to, and then Olaf came into my life on Valentines day. I recognized the potential right away and jumped on the opportunity to lease him. The road since then come with highs and some very low lows, but I have learned much and grown as a rider.

Much through the late winter and spring I was struggling away at a “Couch to 5k” running program. I missed lots of days, frequently had to reset and start over, and never made it past week three. My gym attendance was sporadic at best. Somewhere in there, a dear friend started encouraging me and we became accountability partners along the way. It was him roping me into a marathon relay that lit a fire under my feet and got me consistently training every week. Some weeks later, I signed up for a half marathon on a whim, just to see if I could do it. At the beginning of August I was running 2-3 miles easily, and near the beginning of October I ran my personal record of 7.01 miles on hilly terrain. The daily training and discipline of being “up and done before the sun” was a haven for me over the summer especially, as it was the most stressful year yet at work. Being able to have set aside even an hour in the mornings to just get my blood pumping and accomplish something as simple as a mile before work made me feel so accomplished, and like the rest of the day was nothing in comparison.

In the beginning of September, I attending my first Masterson Method Bodywork clinic, and the experience was eye opening. Until that point I had been fairly sure that I wanted to pursue certification as an MMCP (Masterson Method Certified Practitioner). The first day I was there, after seeing just the morning session, I started looking at what the next step was and signed up for the next clinic before the end of the day. Bodywork perfectly ties together my love of horses, with my sensitivities to energy and touch, and has become a haven for me.

The day after the Marathon Relay in October, I went to the gym. I had been feeling for a few weeks that I was growing too prideful about all I had accomplished with running in the past few months. I was all caught up in the grind, and hustle culture (I don’t think the mindset is necessarily bad, but it also needs the proper dose of humility). As I drove to the gym, I prayed and laid my thoughts bare before God, asking Him to help me see how I could best honor Him with this endeavor. Ten minutes later I was on the ground in a heap with torn ligaments and muscles in my left ankle, and on the bench for the rest of the year. Never pray for patience and humility…unless you really want to be forced to be patient and humble! This injury had me on the bench for two weeks straight before I was even able to walk semi-normally. Whereas I had been the one rising before dawn, getting out there with some serious mileage and waking up my husband when I got home, now I needed help to walk to the bathroom and couldn’t even wear my running shoes because the swelling was so bad. All the things I had been focusing on were taken away. No riding, working, running, or going out except for chiropractic appointments. I was forced into a season of rest, which I’ll admit I didn’t enjoy at first.

But the fruit that came out of it still amazes me. God enabled me to have so much quiet time, to read my bible more and walk through the 7 Steps to Freedom by Neil T. Anderson. I had ample time to have a friend over, get coffee with my mom, and study. During this time I realized how many other areas of my life had been starving as I poured everything I had into running, training, work, etc. I realized how much healthier I felt when I wasn’t able to run or even move, and how important it was to keep that even as I was eventually able to move normally again.

November came with disappointments and discouragement. Just going for walks and working a two hour shift at work left my foot swollen and aching. After having not been in training for more than four weeks, I officially had to give up the half marathon I’d been looking forward to all year. The day of the race passed with a haze of sadness in the background; to have come so close and then have it taken away was disappointing. But every time I felt sadness creeping in, I remembered all the sweet things that came out of that period of rest. Would I trade those eternal realizations for being able to run that race? Not a chance. God gave this awesome body of mine the ability to heal, and the ability to run, which means I can run another race.

December came with waves of anticipation and nervousness. My Advanced 5 day Masterson Method clinic had arrived. A Sunday morning in early December found Chris and I packed into an airplane bound for Houston TX. At home, a pile of Christmas cards (fliers) were waiting to be spread around once I got home, and an LLC was prepared and waiting for business. The week I spent in Texas will forever be a precious memory to me. I was surrounded by amazing instructors, the best horses to learn with, and the most supportive husband to come back to at the end of the day. I had serious doubts about my abilities as a bodyworker all that week, as I saw the mastery of our lead instructor Becky compared to my own issues. I prayed and hoped and practiced and prayed more, but the feeling of impending failure would not leave me. All my anxieties turned to jitters of excitement and tears of joy at the end of the week, however, when I was passed with flying colors and more commendations that I ever could have expected or hoped for. The flight home was one of Peace and excitement, having now the confidence of someone who knew what they were doing giving me their approval.

Since that clinic, I have established The Pampered Pony LLC, and business has been steadily increasing above my expectations.

I am so thankful for all this year was, and for all the closed doors that I can now see were closed so I would keep knocking and finding the right ones.